The opening pages, and really for that matter the opening paragraphs, and more importantly the opening lines of each book – nonfiction or fiction carry the weight for the entire book. I have learned that I can get a lot of things wrong in my book, but if I get the opening wrong then the reader probably knows they are on a sinking ship. For example I have had some criticisms that the dialogue between Nathaniel, Tick and Tock is a bit long and that can be reduced by a page or two. In some ways I agree and I was never married to having that exchange between them last as long as it did. But I even went against my own distaste for the length of the scene because I have to accomplish several things with them that will not be revealed until later on in the series. There is a good reason that that interplay lasts as long as it does. So the purpose outweighs everything else. Besides it is not my story it is Nathaniel’s. It may sound crazy but I have very little input in how long a scene lingers or how fast-paced it is. So in context, the entire series of Trankarri is nearly 800,000 words so to have Tick and Tock linger for a page or two longer than I would want is okay. However the same is not true for the beginning of a book. The beginning cannot waste anytime on non-important jargon. Every word must be concise. Let’s look at a few openings to see what you think.
In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.
I do not need to mention where these words come from. This sentence has been echoed down through the centuries. It is a bold declaration. It doesn’t waste any time messing around with anything that is not essential. I bring this sentence up for that very purpose. The writer of that sentence did not pull any punches. We, the readers must wrestle with the statement if it is true or false or if we believe or not. The point is that opening packs a punch and sets the tone for the rest of the chapter and the rest of the book. (Bible – New International Version)
When I wake up, the other side of the bed is cold…. This is the day of the reaping.
Many of you will know this opening. The first twelve words are not that impressive. It is the last seven words in the paragraph that carry the weight. Day of reaping? Sounds ominous, sounds important – I’ll keep reading. The author did her job well in the opening paragraph although it is kind of frowned upon to open up with someone waking up. Most of the books on writing that I have read, teach – not to start with someone waking up, but she pulled it off and her books have sold millions worldwide. It is obvious that she is operating on a higher level than what the teachers are teaching. (The Hunger Games – Suzanne Collins)
All children, except one, grow up.
This is another one of those declarative sentences. It is true – all children do grow up. Wait, one doesn’t? Who doesn’t grow up? This is such a great opening because it declares the truth then modifies it with some wordplay so you know right off the bat this is going to be an intriguing story. I want to know more about the child that doesn’t grow up. (Peter Pan – J.M. Barrie)
Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much…. They didn’t hold to such nonsense.
This opening still mystifies me to this day. There is nothing about the sentence or even the first paragraph that is eye-catching or heart warming or any other feeling that I get except I know it works. I have studied this opening paragraph for years. Why? How? How is this ordinary paragraph about the Dursley’s so powerful? I don’t even like the name Dursley. But there is something different about the paragraph that sets it apart from most others. My conclusion – it carries the entire weight of the magic in an ordinary ‘normal’ way, thank you very much. I’m baffled. It doesn’t seem like it would work but it does. (Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone – J.K.Rowling)
I’ve watched through his eyes, I’ve listened through his ears, and I tell you he’s the one.
This is a great opening. It promises that ‘he’ is the one. We don’t know what ‘the one’ means yet but it implies that they’ve been looking and waiting for the child or man of prophesy and now he’s here. In addition the author puts the emphasis on sensory detail – through his eyes, through his ears. That carries a lot of weight. Anytime you can include sensory details like sight, sound, smell, touch it will always engage the reader more because those senses are what we are familiar with. The fact that he writes about two back to back adds to the impact. (The Enders Game – Orson Scott Card)
In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit.
There were ten words in the opening sentence in the Bible and there are ten words in the opening of The Hobbit. I am not sure if that is a coincidence or not. Doesn’t matter. Tolkien took his entire mythology of middle-earth and condensed it to a hole in the ground and he did so with a hobbit. What’s a hobbit? Why does it matter? Why would he place his entire epic in a ground? This is another opening sentence and paragraph that I have studied for years. I think the reason is because like Harry Potter, The Lord of the Rings is epic fantasy, epic magic, epic storytelling on a grand scale – I mean on a really grand scale. Because both stories are so massive in scope they have to be able to start normal and slow because once Bilbo leaves the shire or Harry gets on the train, there is no turning back. It is full-throttle going forward and the world that is unveiled with every page turned becomes completely immersive. Both stories are a supernatural outgrowth from what seems to be very normal, ordinary and plain. This makes the magic more magical. It makes their universe that much bigger because they began in a plain ordinary way – almost as if they were planting a seed in a hole in the ground. (The Hobbit – J.R.R.Tolkien)
His fortress was an old abandoned factory once used for bottling soda.
We will spend the rest of our lesson on this opening in the next blog because it is the first twelve words of my story and I am most familiar with mine. I worked on this paragraph and sentence for years. In the sixteen years that I have been writing my series this paragraph has to be the most changed and rearranged paragraph I wrote.
There are many teachers that teach you must begin where the action is. There are others that teach that you must begin with a problem. There are others that even teach that readers don’t have the same attention span that other generations have so you must begin right in the middle of something epic. To all that I would ask, how do the great storytellers start their story? The actual storytellers are teaching us how to start a story, not the teachers of storytelling. And there is a difference – a big difference.
I think with Tolkien and Rowling they knew how big their stories were before they ever published their first word. I say that because I wrote the first eight books before I published my first word. All that means is that I know how big my story became over the years so now all I had to do was come up with a great opening that I was personally happy with. How could I condense my story into a single opening sentence that packs a punch, carries the weight of the magic or imagination and convey what is to come and at the same time give the reader a reason to care. The answers to those questions and why I wrote the first sentence and paragraph the way I did is what we will go through together next week. (Trankarri – The Boy with a Magical Pen – Christopher Dean)
